New Beginnings!

New Beginnings!
"Well hello there!"

Saturday, December 22, 2012

~The End Of The World Walk~

WINTER WELCOME! 

BEAUTY IN DEATH :)

So I went for a walk today to clear my head and of course had to take my camera with me! All was quiet, cold and a little desolate. So of course with the whole Mayan Apocalypse I got to thinking.....What would the world look like if it had ended??? So I decided to do a picture blog of my wonderment! 
Come on my journey to the end of the world with me............

As I was walking I noticed things that made me think....."Oh my has destruction taken place?"











Maybe a house exploded???
And bits and pieces ended up washed ashore.....













Where is the child this shoe belongs too?........

 Would a mother no longer take up her rolling pin and bake cookies for her children?


Would the remaining of us be washed away by the water?


And then the sky's opened up! And I had hope again!




I began to see the beauty of nature I had sought at the beginning of my walk.

I opened my eyes and started to enjoy the journey and not just focus on the destination.

It was then that my mind began to clear and I was feeling more at ease with the day. 



Before I knew it I became lost in the world of winters nature. I was in awe of the beauty around me that seemed to be thriving in winters cold harshness.



 I loved how the water embraces the leafs. 

 The wild Strawberries still show beauty even after their fruit is gone.
Nature is wondrous!
 The cold wind blew this puddle in the night and froze it's ripples so as it stands still in time!





I have a saying "Love follows me" This saying comes from the fact that I see hearts in everyday objects and in nature on my walks.


 However today....even though I saw love all around me in nature, I didn't feel very loved........Until I turned around and saw that love was actually following me!

I turned around about an hour into my walk and there was my youngest son.....Love....Following me!
 I am a VERY lucky mom!

And so I concluded my walk with a wonderful companion and knew that even if the world were to end I would always have lived by enjoying the journey and not just the destination!

Happy Non-Apocalypse! 

~T~



Sunday, December 16, 2012

SADNESS


 I'm a Canadian so some may not think this effects me as it would a fellow American.  I call "Bollocks" on that!!! I have a heart AND I'm also a parent AND teacher.  I have worked in the school system and have had my children in the system for over 12 years.  No I am not effected by it as those who are directly involved, but if this didn't effect you or myself then we have officially become desensitized! I personally hope that NEVER happens! 
Anyway I saw this Morgan Freeman article on a friends fb wall and wanted to share it with as many people as I could get to see it, as well as the victims names and ages so we know the names of the families we can pray for, the names of the ones we grieve for and forget the bastard who stole their lives before being a coward and dying himself. 
~T~
 
TURN OFF THE NEWS.......

Morgan Freeman's brilliant take on what happened yesterday :

"You want to know why. This may sound cynical, but here's why.

It's because of the way the media reports it. Flip on the news and watch how we treat the Batman theater shooter and the Oregon mall shooter like celebrities. Dylan Klebold and Eric Harris are household names, but do you know the name of a single *victim* of Columbine? Disturbed
people who would otherwise just off themselves in their basements see the news and want to top it by doing something worse, and going out in a memorable way. Why a grade school? Why children? Because he'll be remembered as a horrible monster, instead of a sad nobody.

CNN's article says that if the body count "holds up", this will rank as the second deadliest shooting behind Virginia Tech, as if statistics somehow make one shooting worse than another. Then they post a video interview of third-graders for all the details of what they saw and heard while the shootings were happening. Fox News has plastered the killer's face on all their reports for hours. Any articles or news stories yet that focus on the victims and ignore the killer's identity? None that I've seen yet. Because they don't sell. So congratulations, sensationalist media, you've just lit the fire for someone to top this and knock off a day care center or a maternity ward next.

You can help by forgetting you ever read this man's name, and remembering the name of at least one victim. You can help by donating to mental health research instead of pointing to gun control as the problem. You can help by turning off the news."
 R.I.P you sweet angles!

The victims  ( part of an article published on cnn u.s)  http://www.cnn.com/2012/12/16/us/connecticut-school-shooting/index.html?hpt=hp_t1

All the victims died from gunshot wounds and were struck multiple times, said H. Wayne Carver II, Connecticut's chief medical examiner. Their deaths were classified as homicides.
"This probably is the worst I have seen or the worst that I know of any of my colleagues having seen," Carver told reporters.
All 20 of the slain children were either 6 or 7 years old.
Among those killed was 6-year-old Emilie Parker. Her father struggled to hold back tears while recalling the life cut far too short.
"As the deep pain begins to settle into our hearts, we find comfort reflecting on the incredible person that Emilie was and how many lives that she was able to touch in her short time here on Earth," Robbie Parker told reporters.
"She loved to use her talents to touch the lives of everyone that she came in contact with," he added. "She always carried around her markers and pencils so she never missed an opportunity to draw a picture or make a card for those around her."
Robbie Parker also offered his condolences to all the families affected.
"This includes the family of the shooter," he said. "I can't imagine how hard this experience must be for you, and I want you to know that our family, and our love and support goes out to you as well."
Six adults were also killed in the school rampage, including principal Dawn Hochsprung, school psychologist Mary Sherlach, first-grade teacher Vicki Soto and substitute teacher Lauren Rousseau.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Surviving relationships with happiness



      SURVIVING RELATIONSHIPS WITH HAPPINESS

I know,  I am one to talk eh? I haven’t survived a relationship yet…YET. It’s not for lack of trying it is more like “tired of trying and not being enough”.  That and I have become tough to love, whole other blog!!! 

Anyway as I was lying in bed…or was it sitting on the potty???? I can’t remember, as those two places seem to be my “Great thinking spots” where my mind works overtime… so in one thinking spot or another I began thinking of my parents and their relationship and why it was so successful. 

“She was genuinely happy” Yes my mom struggled with self-esteem, weight, health, finances, disobedient children (mostly my brother :)) and all the other things life throws at you. However she was happy through it all, and my inner-self sought to know why?  Why was she happy inside and out? With all life threw at her how could she be happy?  The answer struck me right away…(and I remember now what was happening when I was thinking all this)….. I was in the shower shaving my legs (struggling for some normalcy)…. Anyway the answer to why my mom was so happy is because of my dad….. Her man, her safe place and her prince. My dad always strived to make sure my mom was looked after in every area of her life. Physically, mentally, emotionally, financially and every other way a woman needs a man. Yes men we need you as much as you need us, if not more!!!

So let me explain what I mean. My dad always made sure my mom had time for herself, she was “high maintenance” but not in a Jersey Shore kind of way.  She liked nice things and doing things to take care of herself. She enjoyed her bath or showers and the whole processes involved right down to making someone put cream on her back, she loved that time to look after herself. My dad kept us at bay making sure we let her relax and feel revived..... Cause lets face it ladies, none of us feel good being frumpy….EVER!

 Another area my dad looked after my mom was always having her back. Sometimes she was wrong, as  was he was but they never “corrected” each other in public, or around my brother and I. They respected each other immensely and everyone knew it.

My mom was insecure about her weight; she was always curvy and even after having my brother and I she still looked hot, sexy and full. Health issues caused her to gain more weight than she wanted and she was insecure about it. My dad would go out of his way to make her feel sexy, not just with sex but also with words and lots of reassurance. He never wavered on that, never made it feel monotonous, insincere or like it was a hassle for him. He truly loved her and made sure she always knew. During lilac season he’d bring her home an armful everyday without fail, left her love notes if he left for work before her and she would leave them if she left before him. He remembered little things and was always consistent even when she exhausted him. I remember so much love between them because they never hid it from anyone. My dad was quite a catch and women would “throw themselves” at him and flirt, but he ALWAYS held true to my mom and their commitment. He was proud to be her husband and always was.

All the work however that my dad put into the relationship had always paid off, even though that isn’t why he was doing it. But by treating his wife like a Queen and always working and trying everyday to better their relationship, he got it back in return. By ensuring my mom was happy and taken care of he was also a happy man.

So I guess what I am saying is never stop trying to reach genuine happiness with your partner. In a selfish world there is such a lack of selflessness and commitment or drive to keep trying. It saddens me because I have seen such a love that I don’t understand why EVERYONE wouldn’t want to strive to obtain that.  Men listen to your women, they are constantly giving little hints as to what they need weather they realize they are doing it or not. Truly listen!.......... “I’ve put on weight, or lost weight my clothes are so tight/lose” A.K.A she needs a sweet ass pair of jeans and shirt to boost her ego. “Uggg I need a shower and shave, or I want to sit and soak” Draw her a bath and make sure she gets some undisturbed time to unwind and just be a woman. We all have a certain level of the “high maintenance gene”.  For me…” I need a make-over” lol. I got mistaken for a worker @ the value village drop center…I was dropping stuff off. It bugged me the whole way home, and still does apparently. I need a break from frumpy. And yes I can, and will book a hair appointment and maybe get some make- up and a sweet ass pair of jeans cause I am capable. I’m just saying is all…*cough*cough*hint* :p

My friend Taisha had a story on her FB wall today about a married couple, who in short “Lost that lovin feeling” were going to get divorced.  The wife had dedicated 10 years to her husband, home and son and their relationship became stale. However they found a way to fall in love again.  By the time he fully realized it she had passed away from Cancer.

Below is a paragraph from the story……………


The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves.

So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

 Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up. ♥”

“Behind ever happy woman is a good man, who in turn is a happy man” ~T Original~

~T~
 In memory of Elizabeth Ann Sanderson, A.K.A MOMMY :) 
April 20 '56- June 14 '08

                                              My mommy and daddy on their wedding day.

Friday, June 15, 2012

Fight For it and don't let go!

Fight for the love you have. Respect the one you love and ALWAYS communicate....communication leads to beautiful things!!!! 

Monday, May 28, 2012

The Long Road

THE LONG ROAD!


Yes I am a “bit” stubborn and strong willed! When I make my mind up it’s made up…even if it is the wrong choice, decision, thought, action or intention. I am a heart girl………..meaning it’s bigger than I am or will ever be! I try to live up to my heart daily. Sounds weird I know, but you have to know me to get it. The deepness of my heart is like the black hole that seems to constantly be aching inside me. I want to give and do and change so much that it overwhelms me but it mostly causes great hurt and sadness inside me.  Now to go along with my giant “red” hole...(black doesn’t suit it) comes amazing strength, Compassion and gentleness. All these things have caused me a great deal of hurt as I trust people way to easily and will give anyone the benefit of the doubt. Some would call that “Being Naive” however I am not that at all. I see in people that which most don’t see in themselves and want to draw it out of them. The shity part of that is that I also see the not so good in them. However I have chosen to help and love them anyway. It is my greatest flaw, yet one of my greatest rewards. The point I am making is that this “journey” as I call it has taken me down the long road…one that seems never ending, twisty, rough, smooth, desolate, and crowded. But it is a road that I have found my inner strength, true love, patience, understanding, self-discovery, unbearable pain and fear, alive, enlightened and so many more things. I know my road has not come to my waterfall ending yet, and that there is so much more of it to travel, but I look forward to it now because I’m not alone on this road. I have people in my life although…. very few who have stayed on this journey with me. It is them that I am the MOST proud of and eternally grateful to for everything they are to me. 


I Love you!
~T~


Sunday, May 13, 2012

Change Your Life Photography: MOMS………The Worlds most incredible hero!

Change Your Life Photography: MOMS………The Worlds most incredible hero!: When I was thinking to post an article for Mother's Day I wanted to do something different. Instead of me talking about Mother's and my ...

MOM"S the worlds most incredible hero

 
            MOM’S the world’s most incredible hero's                          




Mom, Mommy, mother, mama, mum…….What does that one word mean?  Notice I didn’t say “one little word”?!!! It has to be the biggest word I know!! It is also the most profound and meaningful word known to mankind.

For some it’s a negative but for the majority the word MOM is a symbol of all things kind, nurturing, strong, warm, creative, giving…and the list could go on forever!!!

Being a mom is the highest honor and greatest responsibility anyone could have. Sure the president can run the country, the PM can make life-changing decisions, a soldier can fight for his/her country but a mother molds those men and women to be whom they are. Good or bad!

Being a mom is at times a struggle, you want your child to be healthy, polite, well off, safe and responsible….but most of all you want them to be happy!! It’s not an easy task to be a mom. I don’t say job because it isn’t, it’s a right, a duty, and honor! It’s the most heartbreaking yet most rewarding thing a woman could do! Often times our kids will take things out on us and direct all anger our way…It’s hurtful yes, but it’s also their way of saying “I’m safe with you and you will love me even if I am being a jerk to you” You see our children need to know that mom will still love them even when they act unlovable. But they also need us to teach them when they are wrong. We do however want the next PM/President? Soldier/teacher/etc, to be an honorable person who can be counted on, trusted, and know what is right and what is wrong.

When a child grows up they will then not only still be our child but our friend. I had the privilege of become quite close to my mommy as an adult. My mommy passed suddenly at age 51, 4 years ago and the emptiness I have in my heart will never go away, it won’t ever heal because I don’t want it too! I want to always feel the strong pain of needing my mommy. I hope my kids will always love and remember me with such passion when my time comes.

Some of us didn’t have the privilege of growing up with a mother for one reason or another, so I plead to women out there who know someone without a mother to reach out…to “adopt” that person, be it child, teenager, or adult. Give what you have been given; be a mother in one way or another, you may never know what that could mean to someone, or how that someone could enrich your life as well!

There are also single mothers out there, regardless of how they got there show compassion, support and understanding. They deal with enough judgment and struggle that just a simple gesture would mean the world to them and give them a boost of power to carry on the already hard task of raising children. Who are we to judge??!!

Finally I want to reach out to children (even children who are mothers as well) Honor your mom, even if she had a hard time raising you, or she seemed “unfair, distant, unavailable” there are so many things sanding in the way of allowing moms to be moms now a days that we need to just look past hurts, misunderstandings and such to find a way t move forward to healing the relationship. Regret is a hard thing to come to terms with when you lose a mother, be it death, distance, or loss of relationship.

I challenge you this mother’s day…Men, Woman, Boys and Girls…Thank your mom and open the doors to communication, understanding, compassion and acceptance but mostly to love! And not just Mother’s day…every day!!!


~T~

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Commitment Phobia in women

 

COMMITMENT PHOBIA in women…. How to get her and yourself through it!

 

I heard a man say not to long ago “Why can’t I find a woman who hasn’t been hurt or damaged by another man?”  And you know it angered me. It angered me because not only have I worked with abused women, but also I am a former one. Women don’t ask to get damaged or abused.  I didn’t ask to be treated like shit or abused in ways that are damaging. I didn’t asked to get raped at 16 or have a male nurse molest me when I was 5…neither have the countless women I have worked with. So when I heard that comment I instantly thought this is not a man who deserves the love of a woman who has been “nursed” back to health…so to speak. It’s also a man I wouldn’t want to be with whether I was hurt or not, because it’s a man who can’t understand unconditional love, and will miss out on a wonderful woman! And before you can say it… NO I am not male bashing…it’s more like stupidity bashing!!!

Commitment Phobia shouldn’t be likened with INSECURITY.  Almost every woman has insecurity even happily married not afraid to commit women. A woman with CP insecurities is based on experiences mostly.


Commitment Phobia .....Yeah we women have it also..........I don’t want to talk about those who like being single and like the attention from multiple men or that like playing around…There is a serious phobia that some women suffer due to certain life circumstances. Laugh if you like but for those of us who experience it …. In any degree....struggle daily to get over the phobia. 

Knowing what is the cause of it.....


Unlike men, who’s fear of commitment is usually due to a reluctance to give up his “freedom”, most women with commitment phobia (CP) become afraid to commit due to hurts. Be it a bad marriage or relationship, parents or family divorce, abuse in their own or a close friend or families relationship. It could also be a combination of more than one issue.
  It’s important if you care about the woman to discover the underlying cause of her CP so you are able to help her through it.
 If she can’t even understand what makes her like that, or if it was from a trauma in her childhood, then she may need professional help to help her understand what the cause is and deal with it.

You also must try and understand her mentality as it likely confuses you. Why does she keep her distance, withdrawal or hesitate? Change the subject when things turn serious? You know she loves you yet you don’t understand why she does and acts as she does….
 A woman with CP lives in confusion. The confusion is, she craves what she is also afraid of: love, connection, and commitment. She DREAMS and CRAVES those things, however her fear stands in the way. She can’t help but to steer away when she feels she has come close to the man she loves.
Although she loves you, she frequently becomes critical of you and hurts you with her words or actions. It seems like she wants to sabotage all that is good in the relationship.

So what can you do to help or make things better? I know how frustrating dealing with a conflicted women is, it’s also emotionally draining, however take heart that CP is not a terminal illness that she will carry to her grave…unless she wants too! She can be delivered from this frustrating and miserable situation. It takes love! DEEP love, and patience, understanding and resolution to help deal with this syndrome. Although the choice is really yours. Is she your “once in a lifetime” love or just someone you care about but you could see your life without her??? Do you love her deeply from your heart and soul? If she is….don’t give up on her.... don’t quit, give her a reason to break free from CP and see the value in an unconditional love. 

Believe that for every man, there is a woman from whom she was divinely created (in Adam and Eve legend, Eve was created from one of Adam's rib). And she is "the one", the only one that the man can ever truly love.
If the man meets her, anywhere in his life, he will never be able to stop loving her no matter how hard he tries. And the feelings will be reciprocal because both of them "made from the same ingredients".
So, if she is "the one" for you, trying to stop loving her will be like trying to get out of your own skin. And losing her will be the greatest regret in your life!

If you know she is the one for you then there are ways you can help her.

Understand what her anxieties are about…


Is it about fear of intimacy? fear of being cheated on?, left alone?, given up on? Or something else? You need to try and understand and appreciate her feelings. If she fears it than it is important to her.  Laughing at her and taking it lightly or being too fast to judge her as being selfish causes her more damage. If she feared being burdened financially or feared a hereditary illness would you judge that? If someone had exploited her financially or a close family member died of illness she would be entitled to those feelings. This is proof that her CP isn’t baseless.  Until she can overcome her fear of commitment, try to find a compromise that you both can live with in anyway possible.  Also a woman with CP will find it hard to commit with a man who doesn’t have his own “issues” in order, home life, finances, work etc….to her she see’s that and worries if she commits she will have to take that on as well as her own issues.

Be firm and sincere in showing your love…


A woman with CP has gone through disappointing relationships or has seen other relationships end badly. To help her you must have emotional maturity and a mature mind. You have to be resilient and sincere in order for her to see and believe you’re really someone she can trust and rely on. Don’t feed her bullshit that you don’t intend to follow through with, because then you become part of the problem.

Give her security…


No matter how tough and independent she may seem, she needs you to help lead her and give her the feeling of security and protection. Don’t be a “sit back and wait-er” You don’t always need to yield to her requests, you can be one who leads in the relationship, but lead with love…gently!!!

Talk to her about it…


Open up the communication channel, listen to what she is saying, sometimes all she needs is your ear. However she won’t open up to you if you can’t be trusted not to take to heart her hurts. A woman with CP needs it more than a woman without CP.  If she is being negative, correct her with a loving gentle manner to think and say in a more positive way. You need to get the answers from your woman and not resort to theorizing or doing crude psychology on her. You need to get the answers from her but without applying any pressure -- or as little as possible. The more you press her for answers the more she withdraws from you or even walks away. You can't pull out a commitment from a commitment phoebe, however great the relationship is. And all the threats, ultimatums, pleading, trying to make her jealous, bragging how other women are attracted to you or even smothering her with attention will never get a commitment phoebe to commit. It will make her push furture away. Questions like, "What is that like?’ "How does that make you feel?” "Why do you think that happened?” "What did you know about??” "Explain what that means?" asked in natural ongoing conversations could uncover what your woman is thinking or feeling in-depth

Winning over a woman with CP is usually not as hard as winning over a CP man. Women are more appreciative to faithfulness and more sensitive to love and tenderness. The key is patience, persistence, and being unshakable. However if you don’t know if she is the “one” for you then don’t go after her because winning her over will be very frustrating and emotionally draining. You may ruin your heart and soul in doing that. So if she isn’t the one it’s best to break up and part ways, not only for you but for her as well.


Believe it or not, many people with a fear of commitment know they have a problem and most don't like themselves for being this way. But they also don't want some "know-it-all" -- who doesn't know that it feels like to have this phobia -- telling them how they should be feeling or what they should be doing. It's like saying "I am perfect and you are not" or "I am better than you because I am not afraid of commitment".  Women with this have been deeply hurt and have trouble allowing themselves to feel vulnerable again. And they are usually the most kick ass chicks you would ever be lucky enough to know. 





~T~

Friday, March 23, 2012

BOUNTIES VS CHEATERS

                             BOUNTIES VS CHEATERS!


Your thoughts.......Sean Payton's punishment for bounties VS Belichick"s punishment for cheating a few years ago......


Belichick draws $500,000 fine, but avoids suspension

Updated: September 14, 2007, 10:16 AM ET
ESPN.com news services
NEW YORK -- New England Patriots coach Bill Belichick was fined the NFL maximum of $500,000 Thursday and the Patriots were ordered to pay $250,000 for spying on an opponent's defensive signals.
Commissioner Roger Goodell also ordered the team to give up its first-round draft choice next year if it reaches the playoffs this season, or its second- and third-round picks if it misses the postseason. "This episode represents a calculated and deliberate attempt to avoid long-standing rules designed to encourage fair play and promote honest competition on the playing field," Goodell said in a letter to the Patriots. The videotaping came to light after a camera was confiscated from Patriots video assistant Matt Estrella while he was on the New York Jets' sideline during New England's 38-14 win last Sunday at Giants Stadium. Goodell will not change the outcome of the game. Goodell said he had considered suspending Belichick but didn't "largely because I believe that the discipline I am imposing of a maximum fine and forfeiture of a first-round draft choice, or multiple draft choices, is in fact more significant and long-lasting, and therefore more effective, than a suspension."
Clayton: Penalty Too Light

John Clayton


Bill Belichick and his team deserved a much stiffer penalty than the fines and loss of picks they got for spying on the Jets. Story
Instead, Goodell imposed the biggest fine ever on a coach -- it represents 12 percent of Belichick's scheduled 2007 salary, which is believed to be $4.2 million -- and took away a first-round draft pick as a penalty for the first time in NFL history.
Reached at his home, Patriots owner Robert Kraft declined to comment. Belichick, however, accepted full responsibility "for the actions that led to tonight's ruling. Once again, I apologize to the Kraft family and every person directly or indirectly associated with the New England Patriots for the embarrassment, distraction and penalty my mistake caused." "I also apologize to Patriots fans and would like to thank them for their support during the past few days and throughout my career," Belichick said in a statement issued by the team. "As the commissioner acknowledged, our use of sideline video had no impact on the outcome of last week's game. We have never used sideline video to obtain a competitive advantage while the game was in progress."

I apologize to the Kraft family and every person directly or indirectly associated with the New England Patriots for the embarrassment, distraction and penalty my mistake caused.

-- Bill Belichick
Goodell's hard line on discipline has been aimed so far at players -- most notably Michael Vick and Adam "Pacman" Jones.
By penalizing a coach and a team he showed that no one, not even management, was immune. "We support the commissioner and his findings," the Jets said. New England, strengthened by the addition of Randy Moss, two other first-rate wide receivers and linebacker Adalius Thomas, is considered one of the favorites to win the Super Bowl for the fourth time since the 2001 season. If the Patriots lose their first-rounder next season they still will have a first-round pick, obtained from San Francisco in the deal that brought Moss from Oakland. NFL rules state "no video recording devices of any kind are permitted to be in use in the coaches' booth, on the field, or in the locker room during the game." They also say all video for coaching purposes must be shot from locations "enclosed on all sides with a roof overhead." That was re-emphasized in a memo sent Sept. 6 to NFL head coaches and general managers. In it, Ray Anderson, the league's executive vice president of football operations, wrote:"Videotaping of any type, including but not limited to taping of an opponent's offensive or defensive signals, is prohibited on the sidelines, in the coaches' booth, in the locker room or at any other locations accessible to club staff members during the game."
The NFL statement said Goodell believed Kraft was unaware of Belichick's actions.
But it said the commissioner believed penalties should be imposed on the club because "Coach Belichick not only serves as the head coach but also has substantial control over all aspects of New England's football operations. His actions and decisions are properly attributed to the club."
On Wednesday, Belichick issued a one-paragraph statement 10 minutes before his regular availability, saying he had spoken with Goodell "about a videotaping procedure during last Sunday's game and my interpretation of the rules."
"Although it remains a league matter, I want to apologize to everyone who has been affected, most of all ownership, staff and players," he said.
The Patriots have been caught once before. Last November, during their 35-0 victory in Green Bay, the Packers caught Estrella shooting unauthorized video and told him to stop.
NFL coaches long have suspected opponents of spying. In the early 1970s, the late George Allen, coach of the Washington Redskins, routinely would send a security man into the woods surrounding the team's practice facility because he suspected there were spies from other teams there.
And coaches like Seattle's Mike Holmgren and Philadelphia's Andy Reid, among others, always cover their mouths when calling plays from the sideline because they fear other teams have lip readers trying to determine their calls.
The most recent hefty fine against a coach was in 2005, when Tagliabue fined former Minnesota coach Mike Tice $100,000 for scalping Super Bowl tickets.
Last November, Goodell fined Tennessee coach Jeff Fisher, co-chairman of the competition committee, $12,500 for criticizing officials. He also fined Pittsburgh owner Dan Rooney, one of his mentors and the man who informed him he had been elected commissioner, for the same violation.
Information from The Associated Press and ESPN.com senior writer John Clayton was used in this report.



Saints coach suspended for season over bounties
The New Orleans Saints' crush-for-cash bounty system already cost them head coach Sean Payton for all of next season and general manager Mickey Loomis for half of it, plus two second-round draft picks and a $500,000 fine.
Former Saints defensive coordinator Gregg Williams, who oversaw and contributed money to the illegal fund, was suspended indefinitely.
Unforgiving and unprecedented penalties Wednesday from an NFL determined to rid its sport of hits that aim to knock opponents out of a game.
Now Commissioner Roger Goodell will turn his attention to possible punishments for two dozen or so defensive players the league's investigation found were involved in the extra payouts that he called "particularly unusual and egregious" and "totally unacceptable."
"We are all accountable and responsible for player health and safety and the integrity of the game. We will not tolerate conduct or a culture that undermines those priorities," said Goodell, whose league faces more than 20 concussion-related lawsuits brought by hundreds of former players. "No one is above the game or the rules that govern it."
The league is reviewing the case with the NFL Players Association before deciding what to do about players who were part of the Saints' scheme from 2009-11.
"While I will not address player conduct at this time, I am profoundly troubled by the fact that players — including leaders among the defensive players — embraced this program so enthusiastically and participated with what appears to have been a deliberate lack of concern for the well-being of their fellow players," Goodell said.
Targeted players included quarterbacks Aaron Rodgers, Cam Newton, Brett Favre and Kurt Warner. "Knockouts" were worth $1,500 and "cart-offs" $1,000, with payments doubled or tripled for the playoffs.
According to the league, Saints defensive captain Jonathan Vilma offered $10,000 to any player who knocked then-Vikings QB Favre out of the 2010 NFC championship game. The Saints were flagged for roughing Favre twice in that game, and the league later said they should have received another penalty for a brutal high-low hit from Remi Ayodele and Bobby McCray that hurt Favre's ankle. He was able to finish the game, but the Saints won in overtime en route to the franchise's only Super Bowl.
"The bounty thing is completely unprofessional. I'm happy the league has made it known it won't be tolerated," said left tackle Jordan Gross, Newton's teammate on the Carolina Panthers. "To think that something like that would happen — guys trying to hurt someone to make a few extra bucks — is just appalling. I mean we have a lot on the line, every single one of us. ... You don't want to see anyone taken out a game."
All payouts for specific performances in a game, including interceptions or causing fumbles, are against NFL rules. The NFL warns teams against such practices before each season, although in the aftermath of the revelations about the Saints, current and former players from various teams talked about that sort of thing happening frequently — just not on the same scale as was found in New Orleans.
In a memo to the NFL's 32 teams, Goodell ordered owners to make sure their clubs are not offering bounties now. Each club's principal owner and head coach must certify in writing by March 30 that no pay-for-performance system exists.
Payton is the first head coach suspended by the league for any reason, while Loomis is believed to be the only GM to be. Goodell also suspended assistant coach Joe Vitt for the first six games.
Payton, whose salary this season was to be at least $6 million, ignored instructions from the NFL and Saints ownership to make sure bounties weren't being paid. The league also chastised him for choosing to "falsely deny that the program existed," and for trying to "encourage the false denials by instructing assistants to 'make sure our ducks are in a row.'"
All in all, Goodell's ruling is a real blow to the Saints, a franchise that Payton and quarterback Drew Brees revived and led to an NFL championship after decades of such futility that fans wore paper bags over their heads at home games.
Brees reacted quickly to the news on Twitter, writing: "I am speechless. Sean Payton is a great man, coach, and mentor. ... I need to hear an explanation for this punishment."
The Saints now must decide who will coach the team in Payton's place — his suspension takes effect April 1 — and who will make roster moves while Loomis is out. There was no immediate word from the Saints, but two candidates to take over coaching duties are defensive coordinator Steve Spagnuolo and offensive coordinator Pete Carmichael Jr. Spagnuolo has NFL head coaching experience; Carmichael does not, but has been with the club since 2006.
When the NFL first made its investigation public on March 2, Williams admitted to — and apologized for — running the program while in charge of the Saints' defense. He was hired in January by the St. Louis Rams; head coach Jeff Fisher said Wednesday he'll probably use a committee of coaches to replace Williams in 2012.
Goodell will review Williams' status after the upcoming season and decide whether he can return.
"I accept full responsibility for my actions," Williams said in a statement issued by the Rams. "I will continue to cooperate fully with the league and its investigation and ... I will do everything possible to re-earn the respect of my colleagues, the NFL and its players in hopes of returning to coaching in the future."
While some players who played for Williams elsewhere said he oversaw bounty systems there, too, the league said its interviews didn't find evidence that "programs at other clubs involved targeting opposing players or rewarding players for injuring an opponent." But Goodell could re-open the case if new information emerges.
After the NFL made clear that punishments for the Saints were looming, Payton and Loomis took the blame for violations that they acknowledged "happened under our watch" and said club owner Tom Benson "had nothing to do" with the bounty pool, which reached as much as $50,000 during the season New Orleans won its championship.
The discipline for the Saints' involvement in the bounty scheme is more far-reaching and harsh than what Goodell came up with in 2007, when the New England Patriots cheated by videotaping an opponent. Goodell fined the Patriots $250,000, stripped a first-round draft pick, and docked their coach, Bill Belichick, $500,000 for what was known as "Spygate."
Clearly, Goodell decided that attempts to hide the bounties were as significant a breach as the original rules violation itself.
As recently as this year, Payton said he was entirely unaware of the bounties — "a claim contradicted by others," the league said. And according to the investigation, Payton received an email before the Saints' first game in 2011 that read, "PS Greg Williams put me down for $5000 on Rogers (sic)." When Payton was shown that email by NFL investigators, he acknowledged it referred to a bounty on Rodgers, whose Packers beat the Saints in Week 1.
The league said that in addition to contributing money to the bounty fund, Williams oversaw record-keeping, determined payout amounts and recipients, and handed out envelopes with money to players. The NFL said Williams acknowledged he intentionally misled NFL investigators when first questioned in 2010, and didn't try to stop the bounties.
Vitt was aware of the bounties and, according to the league, later admitted he had "fabricated the truth" when interviewed in 2010.
Loomis knew of the bounty allegations at least by February 2010, when he was told by the league to end the practice. But the NFL said he later admitted he didn't do enough to determine if there were bounties or to try to stop them.
___
AP Sports Writers Steve Reed, Brett Martel, R.B. Fallstrom and Jon Krawczynski contributed to this report.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Sincerity or Sincrely Phony





SINCERITY?
OR
SINCERELY PHONY?



sin·cer·i·ty
Freedom from deceit, hypocrisy, or duplicity; probity in intention or in communicating; earnestness.

truth, candor, frankness. See honor.

hon·or
Noun
1. Honesty, fairness, or integrity in one's beliefs and actions: a man of honor.
2. A source of credit or distinction: to be an honor to one's family.
3. High respect, as for worth, merit, or rank: to be held in honor.
4. High public esteem; fame; glory: He has earned his position of honor.

Sincerity is the virtue of one who speaks and acts truly about his or her own feelings, thoughts, and desires.

Phony
1. Not genuine; fake
2. An insincere or pretentious person
3. Something that is not genuine; a fake


“Your not alone I’m here for yha.”; “Just call I’ll be there”; “whatever you need, just let me know!” ……. And so forth. Ever had people tell you your not alone, that they are there for you…yet when you need them or are in a bind they are nowhere to be seen, or they are unavailable????? I have…we all have at one point or another.

What about…. “You look so nice”; “you’re doing just fine”; “don’t worry, you won’t look silly”… Yet the ZIT that “looks fine” yet is oozing puss and people can't stop looking @ it, or the report you just wrote for your boss that “sounds great”... to the way your dancing @ the club “not looking silly”.... People telling you things that set you up to look bad. Ever been there done that…got the “L” shaped finger to the forehead? (Or whatever the cool kids go for now.)

Those are just some mild examples, as sincerity is also as explained above.... an extension of honesty.

One thing I personally can’t stand is a phony. Don’t tell people things just to make you feel better or make yourself look good! It’s an ugly trait and we have enough of it in society! Mean what you say and say what you mean. Don’t just fill the atmosphere with shallow words and bad breath. :)  Harsh??? Yes!  But someone had to say it! And since I have nothing to lose in the insincerity department…it had to be me.

A Question I have is…. WHY???  Why do we feel the need to say things we know we really don’t mean???? Or tell people we have no intention of following through on?  Is it to make ourselves feel better? So we can sleep at night? ...Habit???? I say “WE” because I don’t point fingers, however, I really make every effort possible to mean what I say and be sincere! No I am not a saint or putting myself on a pedestal, we all mess up and make mistakes… But I love the people I love, like the people I like, and hate the people I hate. So much so I feel the need to be sincere with them all. If I can’t I don’t say I will. If I say I will I make every effort to do…don’t get me wrong…. things come up and we can’t always keep our word. I’m talking about the ones who ALWAYS say they will and NEVER do. OR suggest this and that just to what??? Hear themselves speak…STOP IT!!!!! Your going to end up with shallow friendships and crappy relationships because people won’t trust you and the decent peeps won’t put up with it! Sure it seems that these people who are less than….let’s say “desirable” get ahead in life by being as such, but they are usually jerks, bitchy, untrustworthy and always searching…"If one wants to be respected then one has to show that they have respect for themselves and their respect for themselves is always true blue and can't be swayed, always maintained. It takes constant maintaining to earn and keep one's respect and a simple moment to lose that respect and once gone is how people will always be remembered no matter what phoney smiles and people around them show them. People think different and certainly talk different behind a disrespected person's back. Their smiles and words towards them are cheerful but phony, but their ears and disrespected thoughts towards them are true and their true feelings about them are always shared with others."

Do I mean you go around telling people “Your not really that cool”, “you look funny when you talk” You hair is frizzy” “yes you look fat in that” “Don’t ever ask me for help because I may not be able too all the time”??  I mean…. Don’t say, “You know I’m here for yha, what do you need?” and then never follow through. “Sure I’ll help you with ‘such and such’” and then not show. Tell someone they did something good, when indeed it was VERY wrong and could get them a tongue lashing from the boss, or worse yet….lose their job…Just because it doesn’t matter to you doesn’t mean it doesn’t mean the world to that other person.

Look, all I ask is that you think before you speak, consider before you commit, and mean it before you offer. It’s WAY easier to do the right thing, and less damaging to everyone involved. And remember.....Sincerity isn't a substitute for truth. Your smart enough to know the balance of truth and sincerity!


~T~ 




Insincerity is always weakness; sincerity even in error is strength.
GEORGE HENRY LEWES, 

“Honor isn't about making the right choices. It's about dealing with the consequences.”


 









Monday, March 12, 2012

Feedback


                         FEED BACK!!!I DARE YHA!                                                                   BRING IT ON!!!!  



Well I have officially had over 400 views since my 1st post and this is the time I said I would reach out to my readers, and even one-time viewers to give me some feed back. I have some posts I’d like to post but worried they may be too harsh or blunt and hurt someone’s feelings. I want to assure you all that isn’t my evil plan to weed out the weak ones, I actually truly want everyone to get what I say and feel my heart in it. So let me hear what you want!!! I want to be real with you all.

Thanks for taking the time with me!!!

~T~